Funny Quotes
Below are our top 100 funny quotes, you can click through for a free desktop background of each!
-
At every party there are two kinds of people: those who want to go home and those who don’t. The trouble is, they are usually married to each other. Ann Landers
At every party there are two kinds of people: those who want to go home and those who don’t. The trouble is, they are usually married to each other. Ann Landers You can download this image for your desktop background or click through here to... Read more about At every party there are two kinds of people: those who want to go home and those who don’t. The trouble is, they are usually married to each other. Ann Landers
-
The best way to lie is to tell the truth, carefully edited truth. Unknown
The best way to lie is to tell the truth, carefully edited truth. Unknown You can download this image for your desktop background or click through here to view all our Funny Quotes! Read more about The best way to lie is to tell the truth, carefully edited truth. Unknown
-
Life’s disappointments are harder to take when you don’t know any swear words. Unknown
Life’s disappointments are harder to take when you don’t know any swear words. Unknown You can download this image for your desktop background or click through here to view all our Funny Quotes! Read more about Life’s disappointments are harder to take when you don’t know any swear words. Unknown
-
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. Erma Bombeck
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. Erma Bombeck You can download this image for your desktop background or click through here to view all our Funny Quotes! Read more about Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. Erma Bombeck
-
First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. Steve Martin
First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. Steve Martin You can download this image for your desktop background or click through here to view all our Funny Quotes! Read more about First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. Steve Martin
-
-
See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time. Robin Williams
See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time. Robin Williams You can download this image for your desktop background or click through here to view all our Funny Quotes! Read more about See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time. Robin Williams
-
They keep saying the right person will come along, I think mine got hit by a truck. Unknown
They keep saying the right person will come along, I think mine got hit by a truck. Unknown You can download this image for your desktop background or click through here to view all our Funny Quotes! Read more about They keep saying the right person will come along, I think mine got hit by a truck. Unknown
-
A celebrity is someone who works hard all his life to become known and then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized. Fred Allen
A celebrity is someone who works hard all his life to become known and then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized. Fred Allen You can download this image for your desktop background or click through here to view all our Funny Quotes! Read more about A celebrity is someone who works hard all his life to become known and then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized. Fred Allen
-
Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give their vacuum one more chance? Unknown
Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give their vacuum one more chance? Unknown You can download this image for your desktop background... Read more about Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give their vacuum one more chance? Unknown
-
It’s true hard work never killed anybody, but I figure, why take the chance? Ronald Reagan
It’s true hard work never killed anybody, but I figure, why take the chance? Ronald Reagan You can download this image for your desktop background or click through here to view all our Funny Quotes! Read more about It’s true hard work never killed anybody, but I figure, why take the chance? Ronald Reagan
Features
-
Cocktail & Drink Recipes
Drink in style.
-
Daily words of Inspiration
Sometimes wise, sometimes true, sometimes just a really good giggle. Updated daily.
-
Your Weekly Cute Fix
We've carefully limited the collection to seven at a time so you don't implode with the onslaught of cuteness :P Enjoy
-
Top Sex Positions
Spice up your bedroom with Chelsey's list of top sex positions to rock your world!
Endorsed Events
-
SpringBreakFIJI
Secure your motivation for the year by locking in SpringBreak in Fiji, your own exclusive island
-
The Fijian Cup
The Pacific Touch Rugby festival (Fijian Cup and Kava Cup) is underway on November 2, 2017 and with support from Touch Fiji and...
-
SPRING BREAK FIJI
From a fully chartered resort, an incredible line up of Kiwi musicians and Rock legends flown in you'll find nothing close to...
-
SPRING BREAK FIJI
The ultimate 5 days & Nights in Paradise!