Discussing :: Weddings - who pays for what nowadays?

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Not so long ago, the cost of a wedding was primarily the responsibility of the bride's parents, though sometimes the groom's parents chipped in for the alcohol. Nowadays, its seems there are no set rules and the happy couple seem to expect both sets of parents to contribute equally - even though the bride seems to be the one who dictates the event. What is your understanding of current practice? Who do you think should contribute? At what age should the bride and groom say, no don't worry, it's our wedding, we'll pay for it? What about second time around?

What's your experience of the cost of an 'average' wedding today (based on a per head basis?)

Do you go for the traditional bride's family looking after things? What do you think is is fair and what happens in reality today?

I think the whole wedding thing has gone crazy! It must have, if people need to employ wedding planners and "themed" days. However, it should be about choice, (the couple's choice) and if parents want to chip in - great. Second time around, I think it would be wrong to ask parents to help pay. Personally I couldn't bear the thought of a "big, over-the-top event" and I don't regret it one bit!

Personally I think that it should be the bride and groom that pay. If anyone else wants to contribute that is a bonus. I also think that it is crazy how much people spend on weddings. It is fine if you have the money to splash but it doesn't make sense when you are putting yourself in debt before you are even married. A wedding is to celebrate a couples love, not impress everyone else.

I was going to get married, and me and my ex fiance were both organising and financing the wedding, with the exception of air flights and accommodation for guests overseas. It can be managable if you keep a budget and don't go too over the top. I agree with animal lover :)

These days it should be shared by both sides.

We paid for ours. We had been living together for a few years and felt that if we were going to get married, we'd do it our way..therefore if we paid, we'd make the decisions. Plus we didn't want to be a financial burden on our parents when we were both earning good money. We pooled our resources, and had a great (though not over the top) wedding with our friends and family. We planned it, kept things to a minimum and it was a great day for all.

It should be shared - gotta let go of the old ways I say

Should be like the rest of life - couples should pay their own way.

There are many unmarried families in my extended family and interestingly very few break-ups! It is expected that a couple should pay for their wedding which also may contribute to why their are few weddings!

Whoever has the most money xx