I have always found friendships very valuable as I am sure we all do really. I love people. I love connecting with people and sharing in their lives, their joys, excitement, thrills, accomplishments etc. I also know the value of having friends that are there for you when you need them.
When I reflect on my friendships over the years the friends I truly cherish and respect are the ones who are honest with me, sometimes brutally. I need to know when I am too much and I also need to know when I am behaving in ways that are not ok. I can be trouble at times but I am growing, as we all too. Your friends are the ones who help you to grow. I love that quote from the notebook where Noah says to allie “you tell me when I am being an arrogant son of a bitch and I tell you when you are a pain in the ass. Which you are, 99% of the time. I’m not afraid to hurt your feelings. You have like a 2 second rebound rate, then you’re back doing the next pain-in-the-ass thing.” I like to think that this kind of conversation can be applicable to friends. I might be mad at my friends when they give me “constructive” criticism (euphemism) but it’s only because when I admit it to myself upon reflection later I know they are right.
I have never been comfortable with being a mean person but as I have grown up and as I am becoming a young woman I realise now the importance of knowing what it is that you value. How many of us sit back and actually think, what is it that I expect from a friend? How many of my friends are actually fulfilling those expectations. Since my new move back to Wellington this year I have had the pleasure of meeting some really amazing people and reinventing myself. I have also gotten back in touch with others I had lost touch with. It is truly amazing how we change, how we adapt and how 3+ years can make all the difference.
I’ve also been reflecting a lot on the kind of friend that I would like to be. I have come to know that in order to manifest and attract the ideal friendships into my life I need to be the kind of person that those sorts of people would want to befriend. This doesn’t mean having fancy things, or being popular etc (its not high school anymore) but more being honest, being reliable, but also being my bubbly, usually positive self. I want to be the person that always has something good to say about my day. That is why I have so loved participating in my 365 days of happiness group on Facebook. Documenting every day what made you happy in your day is a great way of reminding yourself what is great about life.
Even those of us who are introverted and solitary need people from time to time, its human nature. Where would we be without our friends. Friendship is about give and take and as I grow older I realise that it is ok to distance yourself from those you no longer seem to get that much from. It doesn’t necessarily mean they are bad people, it just means you have drifted apart. Acquaintances are therefore great too.
So many of my smiles through life have been because of my friends and I would like to think in 50 years from now some of the friends I have today I will still have then. Because life is about sharing moments, laughs, smiles, tears, achievements, joy. So thank you to my friends, my acquaintances and the people I have yet to meet along the way. Love and Light
He who has a why to live can bear almost any how. Friedrich Nietzsche
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